
It’ll be a quick one today—I’m up to my eyeballs in things to do and of course, today is radio show day. Last month was better, and I’m hoping I make it through the whole show without any glitches—I’ll keep you posted. And of course, I just got back from an overnight stay at a hotel, because Ken and I were at the wedding of our lovely neighbours. I do love a good wedding and I always say, “Meh. I won’t cry.” And then the bride comes walking down the aisle, and the groom lights up, and my eyes fill with tears every time. My favourite part of the ceremony, aside from the joy in the eyes of our neighbours as they tied the knot, was the officiant, who was pretty laid back. She had a microphone that kept cutting out a bit, but at the point where the rings were brought out, she very clearly said, “Ooh, nice box!” And it WAS nice, being velvet and all. Then there was the reception at a local winery. The groom’s uncles were the MCs and they were hilarious, as was the best man—it was a fantastic comedy show, and I don’t think I’ve ever laughed that much at a wedding reception—not even my own.
Then of course, we had to stay overnight at a hotel because it was a bit of a distance from our house. It was an interesting hotel, and by interesting I mean, I will not stay there again, because our room was on the main floor and it had a floor to ceiling window with only a thin window blind separating us from the restaurant patio where several many people were drinking to loud music—I could have stepped out of the window right onto the dancefloor. It was freezing in the room but we couldn’t open the window because of THE PEOPLE RIGHT OUTSIDE IT. But the music shut off around 10:30 and I actually had a decent night’s sleep. In the morning, I got out of bed and the room was still freezing despite the fact that I had turned the A/C completely off. So Ken pulled up the large blind and I opened the window to get some warm air in, and literally 10 seconds later, this old guy yells, “Hey Emma!! Is that you?” And I’m standing there in the window, wearing a shortie nightie, my hair all frizzled from the humidity, bare legs, boobs hanging out, and this old guy is WALKING TOWARDS MY OPEN FLOOR TO CEILING WINDOW. He’s like five feet away from me and staring at me and again, he yells, “Emma!! Is that you?” I yell, “NO, IT’S NOT!!” and slam down the blind. It was like that scene in Life of Brian where he gets up, completely naked, throws open the curtains, yawns and stretches, then a whole crowd screams his name. But instead of thinking I was the messiah, this guy just thought I was his friend.
And I ask you—if you have a friend staying at a hotel, why would you EVER assume that the one person standing in the window of one of over 60 rooms MUST be your friend? All I can hope is that when he DID find Emma, she was fully clothed. Here’s a little earworm for your Sunday: (That’s Not My Name by The Ting Tings in case it doesn’t show up for you)
OMG! First of all, I love your stories, it’s like you live the very life of adventure and intrigue, lol. Second, who in the fuck does that? Sees someone in a window, clearly just woken up and starts to walk towards them like, “hey it’s okay to go open your hotel door because I think I know you.” What an idiot, so you might look like Emma, but don’t assume because you will always look stupid when you find out you are actually wrong. How annoying 😤.
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I was actually terrified he was going to come right in—it was more like a sliding patio door than a window. Ken was still lying in bed but I’m sure he would have leapt to my rescue!
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Now how many hotels offer a scenic view of a dancefloor? The hotel I was put up in in New York 24 years ago when I was on Millionaire was right above the hotel’s steakhouse, which had a glass ceiling… though that’s a different type of voyeurism. I am glad you included the video, because the title immediately gave me an earworm…
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That song’s been in my head since yesterday morning! Watching people eat steak? I’d be yelling, “Emma!! Give me a bite!”
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We once stayed in a hotel where the fire alarm went off and we all went into the hallway and got treated to everyone’s nighttime wear in the hotel. It was quite the bonding moment.
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I can imagine!!
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Please consider changing your name to “Emma”!
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It’s a really nice name, I know!
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Maybe you were Emma in another life.
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If it was Jane Austen’s Emma, then I certainly hope so!
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I love weddings, Emma … er, Suzanne, and I always cry. The hotel sounds less than perfect, but you did get a blog post out of it. 🙂
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I love them too, Emma😉. At least the bed was comfortable!
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Hilarious! I needed that!
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Thank you!
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Ouch!!!!!
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I wonder what would have happened if you had said, Yeah, it’s me!
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And then flashed him, lol!!
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lol
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